My Autobiography

In this life our primary goal is to find ourselves. Without doing so we caot become who we really want to become. We caot discover our real self and find what we really desire to achieve.

Some people go through their whole lives without finding the answer to these question “Who am I really?” “what do I want to do with my life?” and “where do I want to be in the future?”.

On the other hand some people struggle to find the answers to these questions. they try different thing, go to different places, take on different tasks and challenges, and with these challenges they find they real self.

For me it was a summer in college.

I started college without a lot of information on social interactions. I was born in a small town where my best source of information was my parents. And to be honest, they are not the best source of information when it comes to these questions, because I believe they haven’t found the answers to these questions as well.

One day as I was thinking over my decisions and people’s behavior towards them I realized I’m not getting what I want in my life. I am not surrounded with people that I like and my dreams are just dreams and I can’t really achieve them. not that I don’t want to, I do, but things didn’t go in the way I wanted them to.

So I started thinking about my behavior subjectively. I started reading books on social interactions and I came across a term I found very similar to my behavior “Mr. nice guy”.

It was the tittle of a book, to be more specific the book was “no more Mr. nice guy”. It was very interesting and shocking at the same time, why shouldn’t I be nice? Being nice is something we should all do.

So I started reading the book.

The argument was pretty solid. The author was right. Being a Mr. nice guy means putting other people’s needs before yours. It means trying to make everyone happy and satisfied. But I was missing a point, the only person I should satisfy is myself.

So I started taking care of myself, I stopped caring about what other people wanted from me. I stared doing exercises, reading more books that I enjoyed, going out with people I liked.

And the results were amazing. Yes, I did make some enemies out of the people I didn’t like or those who wanted something from me that I wasn’t comfortable giving but I was happy with myself. I liked myself for the first time in a long time. It was like I finally knew what I wanted to do with my life. I filled my surroundings with people I liked with people I enjoyed spending time with. I refused to do anything that a disliked. This doesn’t mean that I was a prisoner in my comfort zone, no exactly the other way around I no longer feared doing new things because doing new things was what helped me in the first place. I became more confidant, more friendly. I realized more people liked me and more people want to hang around with me. I became more successful. Almost like I had a lucky charm, everyone seemed to be trying to help me to get what I want and do what I liked to do.

As time went on I finally learned to enjoy myself, to enjoy my life, to enjoy what I’m doing.

There were obstacles, there is no denying that, but the thing is that I’ve learned to enjoy life the way it is. If something bad has happened, well, it doesn’t really matter because I am where I want to be and I’m doing what I like to do, so a few obstacles can’t really do me any harm.

These days I see a lot of people who are like the old me. They don’t know what they are doing, obstacles, even minor ones shock them and make them depressed, and when I see these people I wish that they could find their real self sometime soon.